


Consolation

by vix_spes



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst, Friendship, Getting Together, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, POV, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-28
Updated: 2012-04-28
Packaged: 2018-01-06 06:44:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1103696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vix_spes/pseuds/vix_spes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gwaine knows that he's Merlin's second choice but still, he'll take what he can get.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Consolation

In the days after Arthur's marriage to Gwen, there's a change in the atmosphere around Camelot. The whole place seems full of energy and everybody appears to be happy. Everybody except for one person. Merlin. And Gwaine has a feeling that he is the only person who has noticed (except maybe Gaius) because Merlin is a very good actor. He goes about his chores with a smile on his face and being his usual cheerful and personable self but there's something missing if you know what to look for and Gwaine has been watching Merlin for a long time.

He's been attracted to Merlin from the word go, since the fight in that little backwoods tavern but it was obvious even then that Merlin only had eyes for the prince of Camelot. So, Gwaine hadn't said anything, he'd simply carried on watching and flirting with Merlin, content to bide his time. He was a flirt by nature and he didn't deny that yet he was also a realist and wanted someone to share his life with. He could never be fully tamed but equally there were no guarantees as a knight; you never knew if a battle was going to be your last or not. But, the person that he wanted for keeps was Merlin. Merlin who was silently pining after Arthur.

Gwaine had watched how, even as Gwen and Arthur's relationship had progressed quickly (too quickly for Gwaine's liking when you took into account Gwen's infatuation with Lancelot – and you had to be blind to miss that), Merlin never lost hope that Arthur would realise how Merlin felt about him or that Merlin would have the courage to speak up. That they could be more than just friends, more than King and manservant. Gwaine watched as the royal wedding grew closer and Merlin's hope diminished a little bit more every day until the moment that Arthur and Gwen were pronounced man and wife and Merlin's hope was completely extinguished. It was then that Gwaine knew that he was going to be the one that picked up the pieces, even if Merlin never felt the same way about him that he felt about the younger man.

He wants to start unobtrusively because he knows that Merlin isn't going to want to draw attention to himself but when his first few attempts fail to even raise a smile he knows that he's going to have to make more of an effort. The first thing to do is make sure that Merlin has something to do in the spare time that he had previously spent with Arthur but that Arthur now spent with Gwen. One thing is for certain and that's the fact that spending time helping Gaius with too much time to think is definitely not good for Merlin. Gwaine's first thought is the tavern. Elyan isn't a fan so only makes an appearance every once in a while which is great as far as Gwaine is concerned because he talks about Gwen entirely too much for Gwaine's liking and Merlin's well-being but Leon and Percival are becoming a regular double-act and are actually rather amusing when they've had a couple of drinks (although they're still good company sober). It's all going great until they come to the realisation that a drunk Merlin is a depressed Merlin. That night tears at Gwaine's heartstrings as Merlin breaks down in his arms and sobs himself to sleep. Gwaine doesn't sleep that night. Instead he stays awake guarding Merlin's sleep, knowing that they'll have to talk in the morning, knowing that he's not looking forward to it, that it'll be awkward as hell.

He's right of course. A hungover Merlin insists that nothing is wrong, that he's absolutely fine and Gwaine is imagining things but Gwaine is having none of it. As far as he's concerned, Merlin has no option but to talk to him; there is no way that he can take Merlin moping around the castle for the rest of his natural life because Merlin's too damn noble to leave Camelot and leave everything painful behind. Seeing that Merlin isn't going to say anything without being prompted, he takes the bull by the horns and tells the younger man that he knows how he feels about Arthur and that news goes down about as well as a brick to the skull; Merlin stiffens next to Gwaine and tries to bolt for the door but Gwaine grabs him and pulls him into his arms, not letting go however much Merlin hates it. He's shaking like newborn foal in Gwaine's arms and Gwaine hates that but he knows that it's necessary, that Merlin needs this. He hears Merlin's breath hitch and then the first sob escapes him and while it makes his heart clench he knows that Merlin has probably finally started to acknowledge the fact that Arthur is now married and there is no hope. All Gwaine can do is hold him and let him cry. Finally, when Gwaine's shirt is thoroughly wet through courtesy of Merlin's tears which have finally slowed and the sobs have died away to ragged breathing, he sets Merlin aside so that he's not practically sat in Gwaine's lap. He then proceeds to tell Merlin about his own feelings. He knows that the timing's not ideal but he's always been a very upfront kind of guy and feels the need to tell Merlin even if the outcome isn't what he wants. It goes better than he expects – Merlin's not running away screaming which he considers to be very favourable indeed. In fact, when Merlin finally leaves Gwaine's chambers to start his chores for the day there is a small smile playing on his lips and Gwaine considers that to be progress despite the reddened eyes and faint silvery tear-tracks down his cheeks.

From there on it's easier. It's almost as if Gwaine knowing has taken a huge load off Merlin's shoulders and his face starts to lose the haunted and pained look that had taken up residence but that barely anybody had noticed. Gwaine focuses on the little things; stealing hugs and the odd kiss from a wildly blushing Merlin, facing the wrath of the cook and the kitchen staff (although they can be placated with a bit of flirting) in order to steal treats from the kitchen that miraculously appear for Merlin to eat and even, on one particularly memorable occasion, presenting a bunch of wild flowers with a flourishing bow to Merlin at the end of a training session, a gesture that had Merlin blushing so much Gwaine was afraid that he was going to spontaneously combust. He's never spent this much time on one person, never wanted to but Merlin is special and it's all worth it when Merlin finally starts to respond to Gwaine's displays of affection. He doesn't stop his blushing but he no longer fidgets when Gwaine flirts with him, doesn't run away when Gwaine presses a kiss to his cheek or temple and actually leans into the hugs, even when they're in public. Even so, he's still not completely sure if Merlin is actually over Arthur or not and that chafes at him. If Merlin still has feelings for Arthur then Gwaine can accept that but it's the not-knowing that's killing him.

It's all worth it though when he does finally find out how Merlin feels. Gwaine is being sent along with several of the other senior knights (Leon is ostensibly in charge seeing as he actually understands and can use the appropriate diplomatic language, being nobility himself) to act as envoys for Arthur with another Kingdom while Merlin is staying in Camelot with Arthur. Just as they are saddling up, Merlin appears in the courtyard at a run, practically tripping over his own feet in his haste to reach them before they leave and practically crashes into Gwaine who steadies him, taking the opportunity to grope Merlin's bum in the process which gains him a squawk of outrage. Merlin's grumbles are all worth it though when, at Leon's command to saddle up, Merlin leans forward and plants a kiss on Gwaine's cheek, the first that Merlin has instigated himself. That kiss, however chaste, plays on his mind for the two weeks that they're away conducting the negotiations and gives him hope.

It's a battered envoy that ride through the gates of Camelot, four days after they were expected, having run into problems on the road home. Said problem was easily dealt with (after all they are knights of Camelot) but they didn't emerge unscathed and all of them are nursing bruises and wounds in some shape or form. Gwaine himself has a strained shoulder and a rather bad wound to his thigh from a sword that has been aggravated by riding. He'll take a hundred such wounds though if it gets him the welcome that he gets from Merlin every single time. He's barely dismounted before a scrawny body is slamming into him. He rocks back from the momentum, hissing slightly as the motion aggravates his wound. But then Merlin's pulling back and kissing him, actually kissing him, not just a chaste kiss on the cheek and he doesn't give a damn about the pain in his leg. He adjusts his hold on Merlin, pulling him closer, and takes control of the kiss, ignoring the whoops of delight and ribald comments coming from the knights not to mention the outraged noises that are no doubt coming from Arthur and concentrates on the sensations he's experiencing and the sounds and responses he's coaxing out of Merlin.

He still doesn't know how Merlin feels for definite (although the kiss seems like a very good indicator) and so doesn't know if he's just a consolation prize but from where he's standing, life is pretty good. It'll be even better if he can just get Merlin out of the courtyard and into his chambers where they don't have an audience.

**Author's Note:**

> If you would prefer to comment on LJ, you can do so [here](http://vix-spes.livejournal.com/88698.html)


End file.
